The power of a factory reset

Yesterday was a horrible day, everything felt like it had fallen into piles of tiny pieces. It took a long time to calm myself. When something distressing happens I can often hold it for some time, running it over and over on repeat, the painful feelings conducting my behaviors, like an errant orchestra. In a …

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Mindful photography

Before I had my most recent period of being acutely unwell from the results of having an eating disorder I had started studying for an online course. I'd had to extend my deadlines a number of times due to my health. It was distressing me that I still hadn't completed it, so as part of …

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Photos from a psychiatric hospital

I've spent the last 3 weeks in an acute psychiatric hospital, I don't feel like writing about the last few months at the moment, but thought I'd post my photos from my time there. I didn't ask for my camera until the last week of being there and taking photos helped me to distract my …

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Parenting and me, part 1 – the early years as a parent on the spectrum

I became a parent to a beautiful daughter at the age of 20. In the grand scheme of things these days this isn't that 'young' an age to first become a parent. To me it was though, emotionally immature and struggling in life I hadn't moved much forwards from the mental age of 16. I've …

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Finding shelter from the storm, emotional dis-regulation and me

Emotional dis-regulation, it's hardly a snazzy blog title is it? I didn't really know what it was until it was described to me last year. I recognised that at times I get overwhelmed, but never had a name for it. Often I respond to feelings without really knowing what is going on, I find it …

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A sense of self -day 18 #30dayswild

I often discredit myself for what I've achieved and resolutely fail to take pride or credit in most things which I do. When you've hit rock bottom it seems important to try and remember who you were, what that looked like and also to take comfort in places which you find familiar. For some this …

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